I couldn’t remember what I was going to write about while trying to write that previous post. How silly (that was me ‘coping’ by obliterating my thoughts). I was going to write my thoughts on how freaked I am about finishing uni and trying to get a real job!!

That someone would actually want to pay me??? I wouldn’t trust/want to employ myself! Those thoughts going round in my head haven’t been very condusive to getting my uni work finished. Which just underlines how hopeless I am when any deadlines are mentioned. I have no idea how to avoid them though? Everything has a deadline. It wouldn’t be a job if someone wasn’t expecting a piece of work to be completed? Those thoughts have been swirling round me head for months now. This week it totally hasn’t help having that MP suggest mental people might like to work for less. While that is definintely the thought I’d been having as a solution to my worries: that if I offered to work for less then there wouldn’t been the same level of expectation and pressure on me – the one thing that made me feel a bit better was recognising that that wasn’t a rational solution or thought, and that of course my work, when I complete it, is worthy, and that with positive support, I would be able to get it done as well as anyone else. Ha! So much for ‘recognising’ that as ‘irrational’! Now someone in real power is suggesting that as the Real Answer! Let me just go and curl up now >>